Failure is not the problem

We tend to think of failure as a bad thing. It means we screwed up somewhere and we didn’t get what we wanted. Maybe it means we disappointed someone. Maybe it means we disappointed ourselves. When failure is a bad thing, it’s easy to give up and do something we’re good at instead of putting in the work to become better at what just showed us where we’re weak.

When I started at CrossFit734 in July, I started a new chapter in my relationship with failure. It wasn’t just about being overweight and out of shape – I knew how that relationship would turn out. It would end with me walking out of the box, shoulders slouched never to return all because I couldn’t do something perfectly.

That’s an old story. No, this time it was different. I was different.

CrossFit introduced me to the idea of scaling work for capacity. I couldn’t do the “prescribed” workout, but I could do a workout with the same fundamental movements that was challenging for me. I did it, I huffed and puffed, I sweated profusely, and I finished the workout.

My body protested through rowing, squats, sit ups, push ups and jumping pull ups. It was painful both physically and emotionally. My muscles ached with after months of inactivity and my psyche dredged up every embarrassing moment from gym class in the 70’s and 80’s. I finished baseline. I was exhausted. I was humbled. I was hooked.

CrossFit also put me back in touch with my love of weightlifting and gave me my second framework for looking at failure as a good thing. Progress in weightlifting requires objective information and hard work. It requires us to push our limits and that means we’re flirting with failure.

To find your one rep max – the amount of weight you can lift with proper form one time – you have to fail. Your mind – well, my mind – will tell you that you can’t lift that heavy weight. That it’s dangerous. That you are too weak. To get to your true max, you have to work up slowly and challenge your assumptions. Sometimes, you have to bail out of the lift. It’s too much. Your form, technique, mobility, strength just isn’t there. If you still think failure is a bad thing, you’ll play it safe and you won’t grow into your potential – you’ll stay weak. But if you associate failure with pushing limits, then you’ve done your work.

Congratulations, you failed and you learned something. You can now push past your limits because you know where they are. You have data, not opinions or fear.

If you want to be strong, if you want to live up to your potential, then you have to fail and use that failure to propel yourself to the next level. Failure is not the problem, it’s part of the solution. Check your ego, reach higher, dust yourself off, then adjust and try again.